Make Decisions, Not Drama
All of you “busy” people, listen up. This is for you.
It’s time to stop hiding behind BUSY. Busy is a state of mind. If you are one of those people who report being “so” busy or “too” busy, you are far more likely to be caught up in thinking about all you have to do and what that means, than actually planning and executing your tasks.
- Busy doesn’t make you important.
- Busy means you are not a good steward of your time and commitments.
Drama is every thought you have about your to-do list and every belief you hold to be true about time. Let me give you some examples:
Does any of this sound familiar? When you strip away the drama, you are simply left with a list and decisions that need to be made. That’s it.
I’m not suggesting that you don’t have a lot to do. Not at all. I am suggesting that some people create a dependency on having too much to do and believe that being busy is honorable and increases their value and importance. Spoiler alert – we are usually measured by who we are and the value of our contribution to the world, not the number of things we cross off of an over-inflated to-do list.
Busy as a lifestyle helped no-one, ever.
You’re not a girl scout, so stop collecting busy badges.
Erika Alessandrini
Here are my 5 steps for overcoming busy as a lifestyle:
Stop saying it. Every time you say that you are busy, you reinforce the mindset that you have more to do than time would allow and it invites overwhelm and confusion into your brain. This breeds indecision and inaction. The more accurate assessment is to take responsibility for what have chosen to spend your time on. For example, if I think I am too busy to exercise, yet I have found time to check Facebook everyday, the more accurate statement is “I have chosen Facebook over fitness right now”. At least own that you did not choose what you call important. If you are not exercising (or whatever), it is likely because you have not prioritized it in your life.
Stop kidding yourself. You can’t accomplish your way out of a “busy mindset”. Many of my clients believe they just need to get to a certain place called “there”. If they can get enough done to get “there”, they will feel better. They won’t. It’s a trap. Believing this concept is part of the problem, not the solution.
Pay attention. Start noticing the patterns of how your thoughts are affecting your behavior in response to your situation. When you are caught up thinking about all you have to do, what do you generally do? When you are taking lots of action, what are you thinking? You have patterns, trust me. We all do. Just notice them with compassion.
Identify the patterns that are not supporting you or your desired outcomes. Write them down. Work to change any unsupportive thoughts so that they become more productive for you. If you need help on how to believe new things, check out this post.
Decide ahead of time. It all comes down to making decisions from the most advanced part of your brain (pre-frontal cortex). This part of your brain is responsible for logic, problem solving, empathy, making decisions in difficult circumstances, taking risks, and more. You don’t have access to this part of our brain when you are experiencing negative stress. Therefore, it makes sense if you struggle to make good decisions when you are feeling overwhelmed or frustrated with what lies ahead of you on your to-do list. Planning your execution from this place is reactionary. When you decide ahead of time, it allows you to plan from a place of logic and objectivity. Plan at least 24 hours in advance, longer if you can.
- Create a comprehensive list of all you have to do
- Delete anything you know you won’t do or isn’t mission critical
- Delegate anything that doesn’t have to be done by you
- Take what is left and schedule it on your calendar – give it a time and a specific window for completion. This is important. Don’t leave tasks open-ended. Determine a reasonable amount of time and stick to it. Don’t put anything on your plan that you don’t fully intend to do. Discard the original list.
- Execute the plan! Be someone who honors their commitments. Minimize distractions and anything that will encourage you to deviate from the plan.
- If you do this, you will probably find that you have much more time than you thought. You free up the time that you previously wasted by trying to make decisions in the moment.
If you do this, you will probably find that you have much more time than you thought. You free up the time that you previously wasted by trying to make decisions in the moment.
Do this every day (or every week). Find a system that works for you. I like to do my planning on Sundays. It sets me up for success. What I know is this…when I follow this plan, I am a Rockstar in my life and in my business. When I don’t, I am not nearly as effective and successful as I could be and I fall into old, unsupportive behaviors. The good news is that it doesn’t take anything more than a decision to get back on track.
There is always enough time. Decide ahead of time. Make better decisions for yourself and your situation. Honor your plan, even when it is hard. Even when you don’t feel like it. That’s all.
