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Welcome to EXPLORING ENNEAGRAM TYPE SIX
The Guardian.
Type Six
Engaging • Responsible • Anxious • Suspicious
Type Sixes anticipate life’s dangers. They are faithful, courageous, loyal, and effective, or cowardly, masochistic, and paranoid.
Let me be clear...you are more than a number. Your Enneagram coaching sessions comes with access to this very comprehensive 12-page typing guide that serves as the perfect companion for your journey in discovering your "essential self."
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Core Fear
They have fear of fear itself, being in danger, uncertainty, chaos, not having support, security, and guidance. They also fear being blamed, in trouble, alone, targeted, helpless, unsafe, and physically abandoned.
Core desire
To have guidance, security,
and support.
Motivations
They want to have security and certainty, to feel supported, the approval of others, to test the attitudes of others toward them, and to defend their beliefs.
Dislikes
They do not want to feel abandoned, uncertain, pressured to do something conflictual, expected to accept new ideas rapidly, or to work with people who are not carrying their weight. They do not want to have their security systems and beliefs questioned, especially by anyone they see as an outsider.
Work style
Relator
Leadership Style
Teammate, Community Builder
Communication Style
Tentative, funny, friendly, warm (or prickly), engaging, rebellious, provocative.
I feel valued at work when:
--> Feeling like I'm a part of a team
--> Others acknowledge how dependable and reliable I am
--> Feeling supported to ask questions and give input
--> Knowing that if I have too much to do, I can count on coworkers to help
--> My boss and coworkers trust me to do a good job
-->Seeing the systems and processes I've created put to use
--> People take time to understand my thought process behind a decision
Type Sixes are reliable, hardworking, organized, vigilant, dutiful, evaluating, persevering, cautious, anxious, believing, and doubting. Sixes get into conflicts by being defensive, doubtful, pessimistic, worrying, evasive, reactive, suspicious, and blaming others.
When Sixes are at their best, they are faithful, secure, courageous, cooperative, disciplined, grounded, self-expressive, witty, and affectionate. They desire to know they are safe, fit in, and belong. More importantly, they want to have certainty and security and ability to put their faith in a trusted authority figure, belief system, or tradition. They see themselves as friendly, loyal, and cautious. They want others to see them as loyal, trustworthy, dedicated, reliable, supportive, responsible, and dutiful.
Sixes have a wonderful sense of humor but can also be a bundle of contradictions. They can be submissive and cautious one minute and/or rebellious and courageous the next. They often take the position of the loyal skeptic to make sure everything goes well and is fair. Being a dependable person, they prefer the role of friend, loyal family member, or dutiful employee. They usually prefer not being in a position of authority because they fear they might be the target for opposition. They typically choose to be in a position under a leader they trust. They gravitate to people who are strong and protective. They are on the search for reliable and trusted authorities and friends who will have their backs.
They are slow in placing their trust in people they meet. They need time to develop trust and assurance since they often identify with the underdog and believe that most people have hidden agendas. They worry that they could be taken advantage of, so they pay attention to insincerity and inconsistencies in others. To determine if a person is trustworthy, they may test that person’s loyalties in a variety of ways. If a person passes their testing process, the Six will be deeply committed and a most loyal friend.
Since they are afraid of being unprepared or caught off guard, they will often rehearse in their mind what might happen and prepare themselves for what they will do in any given scenario. Unfortunately, Sixes often get stuck in analysis paralysis.
Although Sixes have anxiety of what might happen, they need to remember all the good decisions they have made so they can move forward with courage in life and accomplish great things.
Your type in stress:
Goes to a type 3 in stress
- Will not do anything if they think they could fail
- Selfish
- Fears rejection (more so than normal)
- Doesn’t want to acknowledge anxiety and will give themselves busy work
- Becomes very competitive
- Craves more control
- More conceited
- Increasingly more worried about their looks and reputation
From vice to virtue:
Fear:
- Subconscious need to protect the self from everything happening around them
- Accelerating thoughts and conclusions as a result – this acceleration can feel like spinning in their minds
- Hesitancy to do anything permanent
Courage:
- Taking responsibility for permanent action
- Not delegating authority or power to others but taking charge and becoming the leader of their own life
- Doing things with the heart open and vulnerable
- Giving reassurance to oneself
Your tendencies when facing stress & disappointment:
Double-down on making plans or thinking through things to calm themselves and feel even more responsible for the details
Instead, take a break from trying to figure it all out – get some air, call a friend, listen to music, etc.
How your type handles Anger:
What makes you angry: Nothing gets a Type 6 angry faster than inconsiderate behavior. Type 6s are especially sensitive to disingenuousness, bullying, demands on their time and injustice. Your anger may stem from the hurt you feel because you weren’t shown respect or made to feel valued, two qualities you give others.
What’s behind your anger: Because Type 6s are in the Head Center, you’re concerned with having and maintaining safety and security. Your first reaction isn’t anger. Instead, your primary emotion is fear. You fear everything will go wrong. From this root springs fears of trusting others and not having guidance or support. Deep down, you want security.
How you express your anger: If you’re angry at an acquaintance, you may pick your battles carefully and handle the situation factually. If you’re mad at someone you love deeply, you may either avoid the person altogether out of a fear of conflict or directly confront to restore the hurt relationship. Your anger, which masks your fear, may take the form of yelling, having outbursts and/or stomping away.
How to process your anger in a God-centered way:
- Take the root of your anger, which is fear, to Christ. Ask Him to remind you that true peace and security are found in Him alone. Ask Him to heal your heart from the hurt others have caused.
- Spend time in silence listening to God remind that He is watchful over you. Hear Him say that when that when bad things happen, God is always with you and will never leave you.
- Find a safe person or grab a journal and share what’s bothering you. Memorize and repeat God’s word when you feel overcome by anger.
Additional Resources
Emotions Wheel
Stances
Coping Styles
Erika Alessandrini © Copyright 2019 Strategies for Success. All Rights Reserved.
The contents of this website are Strategies for Success’ interpretation of content learned in training or certification programming with the following:
Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC) coach training created by Bruce D. Schneider, Conversational Intelligence® for Coaches training by Judith E. Glaser and WBECS,
the Model by Brooke Castillo, and various other tools gathered over time and through experience.